“Disturb us, Lord, when we are too well pleased with ourselves...” ✨ a brave + beautiful prayer!
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Our God is so much bigger than we think! His thoughts are not our thoughts, neither are His ways our ways. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are His ways higher than our ways and His thoughts than our thoughts! 🙌🏻
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The LORD is so worthy of our trust and praise! Do you believe it today? Set sail! 🙏🏻 JESUS, let us experience the depths of your perfect LOVE that cannot be found near the shore! Your dreams for us are so much better than what we dream for ourselves.
PART II: Today, 20 years after my dad passed away, my Heavenly Father is more than someone I cry out to when my heart aches: it is He who gives me life and breath and everything else. And my Father has a name, a name that carries unprecedented authority and limitless love, a name that makes the darkness tremble and brings me to my knees, a name that pours forth from my lips and brings peace that surpasses understanding: Jesus Christ! My Lord, Savior, King, Friend, and Hope!
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His presence reminds me that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. He holds me close and catches my tears as I mourn again the loss of my dad tonight, and He will wake me up tomorrow with new mercy and morning joy. His kindness is unmatched and unending! Oh, how I long to spend forever praising the One who knows me fully and loves me still! And I sure hope my dad is there, too, free of the weight of this world and filled with a love he had heard about but had not yet experienced.
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Until that glorious day, may the God of hope fill us with all joy and peace as we trust in Him, so that we may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
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📷: Photos captured of my mom and dad in their early 20’s. It is weird to think that my dad didn’t know his life on earth was halfway completed when these were taken. What an incredible reminder to live each moment walking in prayerful and passionate purpose... if you’ve been waiting to see if God is real, the time is now. Cry out to Him tonight. He will answer. Your God is near. He loves you more than you know, dear friend!
PART I: April 10th usually comes and goes like most other days, but this year it feels different. My dad passed away 20 years ago today and I can still close my eyes and walk right back into that hospital room. I remember how his calloused and heavy hand felt as I held it tightly and told him I loved him, asking him to please give me a sign that he was okay even though I knew life had left his body.
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Everything had happened so fast. He was unconscious and on full life support by the time we arrived. I used to wear a ring he bought me on a chain around my neck, and I remember thinking that if I just took that ring off of the necklace and put it on my finger he would come back to life. This idea came to me right after we got the phone call about the accident. The entire car ride to the airport I kept sobbing and pushing that silver ring onto my finger. I guess that is what a 12 year old comes up with when she learns that her dad is dying.
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I didn’t know how to pray, and I am not sure I had ever spoken the precious name of Jesus Christ. But on April 10th, my heart ached in a new way. I lost my dad, and I knew I needed a father. Far from grasping the beautiful mystery that is the Gospel, I stood beside that hospital bed and cried out to an invisible God, a “Heavenly Father” I had heard about throughout my childhood but had never called to in desperation.
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So on April 10, 1999, I said an excruciating goodbye to my earthly dad and took a step toward my Forever Father. I later told Him that I was afraid I needed more, that I had to see Him and know His presence. And in His grace and love, He showed me that “the Son is the image of the invisible God” - He introduced me to His fullness in Jesus Christ, and promised that He would never leave me. He said the very same Spirit that raised Jesus from the dead - HIS Spirit - would be with me always...
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Continued in next post...
“Do not run until your feet are bare and your throat is dry.
But you said, ‘It’s no use!
I love foreign gods, and I must go after them.’” {Jeremiah 2:25}
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Even if my feet aren’t racing, my mind often is. And time after time, His familiar voice asks me, lovingly and all-knowingly, “What are you chasing, dear one?” His question is enough to stop me in my mental tracks. What am I really after here? Love? Affirmation? Peace? Control? Protection? Joy? Provision? Comfort? Justification? Attention? Security? Approval? Power?
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Even as I downloaded this ol’ app they call Instagram today to catch up on what I have been missing these last few months, I looked back over my own profile and thought about the cumulative time I have spent selecting, editing, and posting pictures over the years... mostly of myself. All of these little squares of me, trying my best to look beautiful. 😂🥴 ( <— is this an appropriate place to use this emoji? WHAT DOES THIS EMOJI MEAN?)
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But it is hardly just Instagram. My heart has chased ___________ (fill in the blank) in relationships, jobs, perceived achievements, sticking it to the proverbial man by NOT caring about perceived achievements, travel, material things... you name it! Isn’t the Lord so patient with us? 😭
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▫️ All of this to say I am overwhelmingly thankful for the steadfast love and relentless grace of Jesus Christ, and also for what is becoming a sweet and slow season of sunset walks and late night s’mores. More of Him, less of me. Gosh, I ache for it. And hopefully for all of you, less of me means less selfies, too. 🤣 I’m still working on the less words part...
Happy Birthday to the most outrageous man on every dance floor! 🕺🏻 Dear husband, I am thanking God for your life today and for the way He has so wonderfully and specifically created you. You are an incredible leader and an intentional friend, you are a brilliant man with a humble heart, and you truly make everything more FUN. It is so easy to celebrate you, handsome! 🥳 I hope today is a sweet reminder of just how awesome and appreciated you are. Being your wife (and backup dancer) is a blessing. 🙏🏻 I LOVE YOU, you crazy goon!!! Cheers to you, and to pushing the boundaries of what is physically possible and socially acceptable on dance floors everywhere for another glorious year! 🥂
Thank you beautiful @gennycarsten for being such an intentional gatherer of people. ✨ It is always an honor to be surrounded by these gorgeous ladies, and to be encouraged by the presence of women with such depth, insight, authenticity, and grace. I am still amazed that I get to be a part of this special circle of friends! I am grateful for each of you! ☕️ #classy (the classy hashtag is VERY classy, trust me 😜)
I share a name and a birthday with my Grandpa — named Marissa Don after Donald Bailey, and both born on December 29th.
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He passed away the year before I was born, but his legacy of kindness, humor, and compassion lives on through my beautiful mom and her siblings. From the stories I have heard, he had the rugged strength and tender heart of a true cowboy. He was beloved as a father and a soldier, a husband and a friend.
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Happy Veteran’s Day to the brave men and women who have fought for the freedoms we enjoy today. You are not forgotten. We see you, we honor you, and we thank you.
🙋🏼♀️ I need this right now. This week has seemed to bring to the surface so many areas of my inadequacy — as a friend, wife, employee, leader, daughter, sister... you name it and I can list the ways I am falling short.
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My fear and my pride remind me to “be better” and to “do more,” and in my flesh I listen and agree.
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But that is not the voice of God. My Good Shepherd addresses me always as “My Beloved” and speaks only life over me. It is HIS perfection - his perfect love - that drives out my fear. It is the glorious presence of my Savior that humbles my heart and rescues me from my pride.
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Jesus, take my eyes off of myself. Fix my gaze on you, and renew my tired mind. I am not the Savior, YOU are. Tell me again that it isn’t about DOING but about BEING, simply being yours.
Two years ago I was working in sales at a tech startup company in Orange County, California. My heart wrestled daily with what I knew my Good Shepherd had whispered into my spirit ten years before. I had heard Him, but I never believed Him. There was no way I would ever be pure enough or knowledgeable enough to step into ministry.
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“Daughter, boldly proclaim the name of Jesus Christ.” Even at my darkest, the impossible words of my Maker sang sweetly to my soul.
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At work today I sat around a dinner table with these incredible and inspiring brothers and sisters, and I leaned in as each one shared stories of our Savior gently moving them from darkness into light. Their eyes sparkled and their faces glowed as they spoke the precious name of Jesus Christ, recounting the ways He had rescued and regenerated their hearts. They talked about revival and the revolutionary reality of the Gospel.
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I listened in awe of our God, deeply encouraged by the way He is using His children to share His love with the world. @crazylove @harmonygrillo @alysfight — You refreshed my heart tonight! What you are doing matters, and is echoing in eternity even now. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.
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And right now, I am at home with tears of wonder streaming down my face. The words of my Good Shepherd are far more powerful than my impurity or my ignorance. Jesus has imparted His purity to me; His Spirit is the one who gives wisdom and revelation and knowledge. He is Love, Life, Light, and Truth. And I am His.
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“For He spoke, and it came to be...”
